Van had been job hunting for quite a while. His only real experience was farming, and he was an expert at that. But his farmlands that had been cultivated by his family for 140 years had been the subject of a land claim by the Mompara Tribe whose forbears had owned the land before Van's Oupa had bought it for ten pounds plus a rifle and a Sunday suit in 1840.
Although Van was 'paid' R1,7 million for the farm by the Government, it was only three and a half years since the transfer and he had not yet received his check. (Payment obviously takes place in 'African' time) This of course left Van and his family destitute and broke.
As the reader can appreciate, when you have a Wife, 14 children, 27 grandchildren, 3 horses and 8 dogs to care for - this is a considerable problem!
So it was with great joy and celebration that the family received the news that Van had landed a job. It was an important one too - even though it was on a contractual basis. Van poured every one a glass of his best peach mampoer and proudly told them: "Mense, I got a lekker contract with the Drolriviere municipality, and there are 11,762 people under me!" The family were so impressed! "But that is not all, the mayor Mr Keepitall Nondelivery told me that there will be more people under me every week" YISLIK, this are blerry impressive stuff hey!
Later that evening - when the festivities were over and everyone was sleeping where they had passed out - Van presented the contract top his Wife with an understandably proud flourish. She got out her best glasses that Van had bought for her at the Apteek chemist ten years before. Sure enough, Van had the contract!
Contract Between: J J S P Van Der Merwe hereinafter known as the 'Contractor'
and
Drolriviere Town Council hereinafter know as 'The nunicipalty
WHEREAS:
Mr J J S P Van Der Merwe is hereby appointed as the Municipality contractor to cut the grass in the Drolriviere Cemetery, and to tend the Graves of those interred therein. This is currently 11,672 but will of course increase at an unknown rate.
NOTE: The Municipality has had to erect a security fence around the Cemetery as people are dying to get in there.
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