FIFTY YEARS OF MARRIAGE!

The Van Der Merwes had been married for fifty years! Fifty years...Van couldn't believe it.  He was the first to acknowledge that he was a cantankerous and difficult man' He remembered the things that he had put his wife through, like when he had been sleeping in the back of his VW Beetle and  'Vroukie' had to change the Tyre. Then there was the time he had a 'thing' for the lekker poppie  who lived in Blikkiisdorp. (A small town just to the East of  the Drolriviere) Sure, nothing had happened between them, but his infatuation was obvious to all who new him.
In all those fifty years Van had never bought a flower or even a box of chocolates for his wife, and tell her that he loves her? Nee Boet, that is not what a man does. Besides that, Van snored most of the night away, and all the boerwaors and biltong he ate caused him to fart to the extent that Van and farting were synonymous! Yet here she was, still beside him after fifty - often trying - years. A mother and Grandmother supreme.
On their anniversary day Van took  his vrou out for a special treat to the Voortrekker monument in Pretoria. He was so excited that he kept it as a secret until they were there, because he wanted to see the joy and excitement in her eyes when she realized where they would be spending this special day.
After a lekker lunch of Steak, boerwors, lamp chops, pork chops .pap, eggs and chips the couple sat down in the gardens to relax and reflect - and alsoso that Van's farting did not annoy other people visiting the monument.
Reflecting on his wife's patience and her wonderful loving  attitude which had characterized their entire married life, he thought to ask her how she had always maintained such goodness, despite his often crude and vulgar behavior.So he asked her straight out: "Skat, how come you wasn't a vroue what ran off when ek didn't knew how to behaves?"  She replied: "Mannetjie, when you are acting like a po#ph#le then I just go and clean the toilet"    "Claen the toilet" Van exclaimed, "How does that help?"  (Juslik he thought, my ou goose is getting a bit soft in the Kop! ) "You see van, when I clean the toilet I use your toothbrush....."